Thoughts

Acceptance

Why is it so hard to do? Why do we love dwelling in the past and worrying about tomorrow. Why is right now almost never good enough?

We love to complain. Things are never perfect (which me the way I expect them to be). It’s too cold, it’s too hot, I’m lonely, people won’t leave me alone, there is too much traffic, the beach is too sandy, the pool is to chlorinated, my flight is delayed, the train is too slow, the kids wont shut up, the car won’t start, the boots I want are not on sale, the sun is too bright, it’s raining, it’s too windy. That waitress was a bitch to me, that guy never paid me back what he owes me. I can fill hundreds of pages of things that we complain about. Things that didn’t go the way we wanted them to go.

If I cannot accept something that I cannot change, I am creating my own resentments. I am actually choosing to to feel bad about it and stay feeling bad about it. I will also tell everyone who will listen to me about why I should feel bad. I will say things like “well if that happened to you, you would feel exactly like I do” or ” well I’m right ,so I have a right to be angry”. To be sure, no one will ever take away your right to be angry, but how does that feel? When I’m upset about something that doesn’t go my way then I’M UPSET. I feel bad. The plane that was delayed doesn’t feel anything. Why would I choose to feel bad? or better yet why would I choose to stay feeling bad?

Today I try not to expect anything. I especially don’t put expectations on the people in my life. If I do put expectations on a person or situation and it doesn’t happen that way, it’s ok. You may think this is weird or unacceptable but it has truly worked wonders in my life. If I want people to accept me where I am, I have to accept them where they are. If I want to receive love and kindness then I have to give it. If I give anger and negativity, I will receive that too. I also usually find when things didn’t go the way I planned or expected, it turns out even better. And even if it’s not better, I believe it turned out the way it was supposed to. This may seem alittle Pollyanish to some of you but it works for me. If I do get angry or upset, I never stay there very long and I can live in peace and serenity most days.

Remember anger and resentment are choices. Choose wisely!

In Love and Service, Betty

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